Within Reach

I wanted to hug you when
we last met, but was afraid.
you see, I had already fallen

or was it that I tripped and fell
and was free falling because
that is the feeling I get when
you’re close enough to see the
sparkle in your eyes

yet there was no fear of the
impact only that someone
would reach out and catch me
not understanding the meaning
directly or the need to make a
precision landing

deep within the heart of the one
person who moved me in a way
when she smiled gave the
sensation that nothing was missing

you were and always will be my love
at first sight on any given day or in
the dark of any random night

and for as long as I know you I will
keep asking how to find Polaris
because there is nothing quite as
beautiful as standing behind you
star gazing knowing the most
amazing person is within reach

Robert S Katovski Olson2018

The Eve of Something More

The thing is this, I’m scared
a long time ago taking what
remained my heart with
its shards and fragments I
placed them all within the
relative safety of a box

a heart shaped box held fast
by a heart shaped lock and
sealed in wax made out of
tears bled from a thousand
lifetimes of heartache

then taking it to the deepest
darkest depths of and already
imploded inner most world to
the furthermost stone of rock
bottom

inside this heart shaped stone
I lay to rest the heart shaped
box containing every hope and
dream of every life lived from
the beginning to the present
which is empty for I have no
heart

cutting deep and long my hand
I sealed this tomb in the blood
which once pulsed vibrantly
then turned and walked away

returning to life as an outsider
looking in, wondering if happiness
is worth the pain of endurance

yet I feel this may be the eve of
that something more which has
evaded me for eternity

having just now returned from
the stone of rock bottom, sitting
with the heart shaped box on my
lap, picking at the wax with a heart
shaped key

wondering when the lock turns
open if then time will have truly
healed what was ultimately
broken beyond repair

will then the pure light of truth
reveal once again she who has
filled my dreams since the ink
dried on a worthless piece of
paper

one indiscretion does not erase
the multitude of amazing one
person is or contains

If I could only paint a picture
of a thousand words it would
look something like this

I forgive you

Robert S Katovski Olson 2018