Unburdened

it’s that hour
in that dark place
trapped inside myself
wanting desperately to break free
Inaudible is the silent scream
from within this self inflicted cage of shadows
where my demons come out to play
their game is old but I am weak
yet I am amused
by the awkward display of affection they bring

from inside I see myself standing on a hill far away
weathered but no longer beaten down
seeming to have found peace
no longer living the torment
only wearing the story in the lines around my eyes

thinking deeply of how I long to see
the stars unburdened by city lights
seeing a time and place
one that is not a memory
but one that is a memory waiting to be born
It’s clear that existence
plays out differently than our dreams
but then who is the master of our inner world
maybe the craziest thoughts
that play out in our minds eye
are our true reality
making our present an altered state

realizing that nothing
is as real as it may seem
while pondering evolution
or the evidence that humanity
is evolving so quickly
that when it comes full circle
in many aspects
it will be no better
than when it began

Is it then anti social
to disassociate from society
before the collapse
even when it has nothing
to offer but true degradation

finding the wider gap of separation
between humanity and the human race
longing to roam free from what it has become
could this be the truth in happiness

meanwhile everyone is dressing for the future
while I dress to fit within today
so that no one is the wiser

and yet the struggle only seems real from the inside
and what’s more difficult to convey
than this to someone on the outside
who only sees the facade
Katovski©2015

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